Respect

[A  few years ago I devised a sermon, "Seven Effective Attitudes of Unitarian Universalists"   One of the seven attitudes I identified is respect.]


One of the important twentieth century historians of Unitarianism cited Individualism, Freedom of Belief and Conscience, and Toleration as the great markers of our tradition.

Toleration always struck me as condescending, a passive rather than active attitude.  Acceptance is only a little better.  (Remember Thomas Carlyle’s famous response to Margaret Fuller’s declaration, “I accept the Universe.”  He said, “Egad, she better!”)  I favor Respect, which contains Acceptance and Toleration and more.

We respect the many religions of the world, not as much for their beliefs as for their origins from the same human impulse to seek meaning and purpose, as well as for the role these religions play in family and community.  Such diversity is a fact of human culture.  And then the great world religions each bring a different, relatively unique emphasis to Universal Religion.  For example among the Abrahamic religions, Judaism brings Justice, Christianity brings Love, and Islam brings Surrender to God’s will.

Our attitude of respect relates to what we call our first principle: “the inherent worth and dignity of every person.”  Our reasoning begins with respect for self that logically extends to our fellowkind.  Two hundred years ago, our forebears emphasized that human kind was indeed formed in the image of God and that we had a natural divinity, too.  In a similar sense to the Buddhists bowing before one another to acknowledge the Buddha-spirit in one another, so we figuratively bow to the divinity of one another.  Some of us might be more comfortable with an Enlightenment recognition of egalitarianism and rights, but we nevertheless agree that what each of us recognizes in self extends empathetically to all.

In recent years our respect has expanded to include not only other forms of life, but also to include the whole of the earth.  This has been expressed in another principle that declares, “Respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part.”

In my mind, Respect has an element of Reverence.  Indeed, Reverence is Respect written large.

Third Story: Death

2005 Standford University

"My third story is about death," Steve Jobs said in his now famous “The Commencement Speech, delivered in the throes of pancreatic cancer. His third story was an intimate personal story--a story that resonates to a universal human story. 

I've spent thirty years putting death into its proper context. Steve Jobs did so in this single speech.  He spoke from personal experience with brevity, sensitivity, and just the right tone and authority for our age. That’s why it’s appearing everywhere, offering sobering inspiration. For example, CNN played the speech in its entirety during the morning broadcast following Mr. Jobs’ death.

“No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new.”

The he told the newly minted graduates, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Such carpe diem counsel is nothing new.

I'm completing a book, Wisdom for the Ages: A Season with Ecclesiastes that highlights Ecclesiastes down-to-earth philosophy of life, dating from 2300 years ago.  It draws from an even older vein of wisdom found on 4000-year-old Babylonian tablets, collected as the Epic of Gilgamesh.

Similar advice comes from a variety of ages and cultures:  Experience and gain knowledge. Enjoy life with the one whom you love. Work hard and enjoy the fruits of your toil-- figuratively, wine and bread in moderation.  Don't let the things you pursue and acquire overwhelm you.  Never forget, even in your youth, that death is your fate.

Steve Jobs’ death is a "Big Chill" moment for Baby Boomers.  We’ve paused and are reflecting.

He's given us incredible technologies. He's also given us something more valuable via that simple, remarkable speech, yet another expression of a timeless philosophy of life: know that you are mortal and that your death can come at any moment; nevertheless, live and enjoy the life you have to its fullness.  

And by example, he recommended that when death comes, meet it with dignity, grace, and no regrets.